IntegrativeCoaching

Most of it comes down to how we talk to ourselves.

The voice doesn't stop. It's running for everybody. What changes over the years is how much of it we're still registering — the criticism, the expectations we picked up somewhere about who we were supposed to be by now, and how much less kindness we hand ourselves than we'd give anyone else without thinking about it.

Most of us go numb to it rather than deaf. So we start by listening again. Then we look at what gives you energy and what takes it, and how to work with both — not by cutting the draining part out, which usually isn't on offer, but by knowing which is which and what it costs you.

The next level might be work. Mostly it's about a life with purpose in it.

Integrative just means I don't fence off the parts. Live, work, play — they aren't separate in you, so we don't pretend they are in here.

Who you'd be working with

I'm a dad with tattoos who spent fifteen years in restaurant kitchens before any of this. I've built organizations, run a camera for a living, and sat in a lot of rooms where nobody wanted to say the real thing.

Most of the people I work with are men somewhere between forty and sixty-five, doing well on paper, with a next thing they can feel and can't quite name. Most stay well past the first three months — a year and a half is about average, and some are still here.

It starts with a relationship that's deeper than a tactical, playbook style. I've had an executive coach in the past, and the ability to connect on a personal level plays a far bigger role than I can articulate. It's not a coincidence that I feel like you get me. You're helping me surface what is largely already inside of me, and empowering me to go find it. It's letting me know it's ok to be me. Mike Altfest · Director of Community Engagement & Marketing, Alameda County Community Food Bank

In coaching you do the actions, versus consulting. It changed my attitude toward defining my goals and how to achieve them. David is a very good listener of little details or hints in our conversations — organized, follows a structure, doesn't get distracted out of the main goals. Gonzolo · coaching client

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How it runsThree monthsTwelve sessions. Three a month with me, and one that's yours alone. We talk about what's next around session nine — most people keep going.
Ninety minutesEach session. Long enough to do more than talk.
The solo oneProtected time to do the deep work without me leading it. I'm around if you want me. Mostly it's yours — the practices don't take unless you're doing them when nobody's watching.
Before & afterA short form before each session — what you're working toward, what's going well, what's draining you, what you're noticing, what you're committing to. About fifteen minutes, and it usually surfaces something before we've spoken. A written report a few days later.
Each sessionYou leave with one commitment. Yours, not mine, and usually smaller than people expect.
What's in itBreath, movement and sitting practice alongside the conversation.
WhereRemotely by default. In person around Houston if you'd rather.

What I'm working from

I say these out loud in the first session, so you know what lens you're being handed and can argue with it. You don't have to agree with any of them. Clients tend to end up using them on their own teams, which was never the plan.

Relational over transactionalWhat's between people is the material, not the overhead.

Distributed over hierarchicalAuthority is usually more shared, and more available, than it looks from inside.

Justice over charityFixing the situation beats being generous inside it.

Discovery over downloadYou already have most of it. I'm not here to hand you a model.

Where the approach comes from: Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction in the Kabat-Zinn lineage. The yoga sutras and pranayama. Yogic philosophy. Compassion integrity training. Restorative justice practice. The inaugural InnerMBA cohort at NYU with Sounds True. I mention it because it's load-bearing, not as credentials — it's why the work can sit with something difficult instead of rushing to fix it.

I'm not going to tell you what to do. I have opinions and I'll share them if you ask, but you're the one who has to live with the decision.

And I'm not going to help you get better at absorbing something unsustainable. If the structure is the problem, we'll talk about the structure.

Start with a conversation

$7,500 for the first three months

Most people do several stretches — we decide that together each time, around session nine. Before any of it, thirty minutes. No charge, no pitch. If I'm not the right person for what you're carrying, I'll tell you.